"I thought she would be my best friend forever..."

Saturday 2 March 2013

"I thought she would be my best friend forever..."

She was all I wanted in a friend. She was humble, intelligent and very beautiful. We shared the same philosophy of life. As a fresher, she wanted to study firmly to come out with the very best result, and so did I. She detested the sight of girls who wore indecent dresses and rarely came to class and so did i. we had so much in common and so I decided to make her my friend for good.

Her name was Sharlee Davids. Sharlee and I could be compared to two glued containers, totally inseparable. We did virtually everything together. Because we were in the same department, we studied together, attended the same church and dined in the same place at the same time. We were so close that people were so sure that we would remain friends forever.

On my own part, I had made up my mind never to have any friend other than Sharlee. To me, there was no need to be extra-social, one friend was just good enough. I confided in her, told her things I never told anyone because somewhere in a book, I had read that your closest friend should know your secrets, whether good or bad. I had never ever considered the fact that one day we could be enemies. She was indeed my sister from a different mother. I just lived in the moment.

Things were good between us as time went by. When results came out, we made the same grades and we were simply happy. At least I was. However, in our second year, we began to draw apart. It started when we paid our hostel fee and logged in only to discover that we got different hostels. At first, we felt bad about it but we came to a resolution that it was God’s way of testing the strength of our relationship. Oh! What a test indeed!

We made our plans, of course to ensure that our relationship grew stronger. We promised to visit each other at least three times in a week, call on each other when heading off to class and most importantly, study together at all times. Well, some plans simply just remain plans.

For the first two weeks, we followed our plans but in the third week, things began to change. Whenever I called her to go for classes, she would tell me she was already in class. During time for studies, she would complain that she did not have the strength to follow me to my hostel. We started to see less of each other and it really got to me, so I decided to visit her to dialogue with her because mehn, I cherished her.

When I got to her hostel, her roommates let me know that she had gone for night class. I was flabbergasted at the spot. Night class? Something we swore we would never do? Out of curiosity, I asked if she had gone with someone and they said she went with a girl called Chidiebere, a classmate of mine who was in her hostel.

I felt very bad that day, not because she went for night class but because she did not tell me or even convince me to come with her. That day, I began to feel that she did not value me as I did her, that she was my friend merely because we were in the same hostel. On the next day when I told her how I felt, she made this statement to me, “Catherine, you need to know that we are no longer in the same hall. Coming to your hostel all the time is really stressful”. That statement worsened how my poor heart felt because if I could really feel no qualms about it, how could she?

To make matters worse, I began to see her with Chidiebere frequently and everywhere. They began to walk to class together and study together. They shared everything together, just like sharlee and I did. Nevertheless, I never gave up on our friendship because like I said earlier, I vowed she would be my friend forever. I sent her lots of text messages about how i felt but got no reply. The times I got any, they were brief and clueless. I even went to extent of telling her that I hated her new friend and I put her in a position to choose between Chidiebere and I. She chose Chidi of course and then, I felt as though I had no one. I could hear whispers in class whenever I walk alone in class. It was though everybody talked about me and mocked my lonely self.

Truth be told, I lost focus that semester and it affected my results. Watching the friend I loved so much hang out with someone other than me hurt me like hell. I adapted to the situation of course but never fully until one day, when I discovered that I had been the problem all the while.